I finally took the plunge. I dragged myself kicking and screaming into the Twitterverse.
I get Facebook (mostly). I love the visual appeal of Pinterest. And I wonder if anyone over the age of 40 actually uses Google Plus, Reddit, Tumblr, Four Square, Instagram or other social media du jour.
But Twitter? I’m feeling like a Twidiot.
I might as well be learning to speak Mandarin, that’s how foreign Twitter feels to me. From Hashtags and Retweets to Direct Messages and Mentions, I’m walking around in a social media haze.
Hashtags, in particular, confuse me because when I look at this: # I see the pound sign, thanks to my high school typing class. The only time I actually get hashtags are when Jimmy Fallon does a skit about them, like this one with Justin Timberlake:
As I learn more about blogging and social media and try to get back on track with my freelance writing, I feel pressured to be on Twitter, if nothing else than to boost my marketing efforts, follow editors for the inside scoop on their editorial needs and read funny Tweets from Ellen. But I’ve been avoiding Twitter like a flu shot. It might be good for me, but I just keep putting it off.
Finally, after one too many deer-in-the-headlights looks when asked if I’m on Twitter, I caved and joined “the voice of the world.” But to me, Twitter is just one more piece of technology to stumble through.
On Facebook, it took me weeks to figure out how to upload photos and how to not only “like” a page but also “follow” and “get notifications,” because apparently, they’re all somehow just a little different. And, before I understood private messaging, I shared way too many personal comments on friends’ Facebook pages, like, “How’s that weird rash of yours? Is the ointment helping?”
On Pinterest, I’m trying to figure out how to add “rich pins,” write SEO-friendly captions, include pin-worthy images and create secret boards for things I might not want to share with everyone, like wine porn and celebrity crushes.
And now, I’ve got to get myself up to social media speed on Twitter. So I’m poring through the FAQs in the Twitter Help Center, trying to learn the Twitter lingo, Googling “Twitter for Dummies” and scanning Twitter cheat sheets. And yet, despite all this help, I think I just Tweeted myself. Oh my.
My first mistake? Thinking I had 140 words to share in my Tweets. That I could handle. But 140 characters? That’s barely even a run-on sentence. It will take me 10 minutes just to compose, revise, edit, rewrite, proofread, re-edit and re-proofread every Tweet. It might actually be possible to edit a Tweet once you post it, but I don’t know how. And with my giant gorilla thumbs constantly hitting wrong letters (and typing things like “titter” instead of “Twitter”), I don’t want to hit the Tweet button a moment too soon.
Plus, like any social media platform, there are Twitter rules, tips and etiquette to follow. As a writer, I’m not liking some of them. According to Twitter for Dummies, rules of grammar and punctuation fly out the window when you send a Tweet. I’m such a grammar nerd that I literally speak punctuation marks into my iPhone when I’m creating a voice-to-text message (which I use because of my gorilla thumbs problem). How am I going to impress an editor on Twitter with bad grammar and abbreviations? (#writerproblems)
A few of my favorite rules so far:
- Don’t pull a Twitter one-night stand, where you follow someone and then dump her as soon as she follows you. (Twitter sluts are a thing?)
- Don’t Tweet that you are bored. Now I am too. (HaHa! Love this one.)
- Strike a balance between lurker and spammer. So I don’t want to be shy girl in the Twitter corner, but I don’t want to deluge followers with my every thought. Got it—no need to overshare.
- Capitalization makes all the difference, as duly noted by Susan Boyle’s PR team when she released her new album with this Tweet: #susanalbumparty.
So, if you want to follow me on Twitter, I’m giving you a BOGO:
- My Tweenior Moments handle is @TweeniorMoments (for blog-related and humorous stuff).
- My freelance writer’s handle is @LisaBeachWrites (for writing-related and professional stuff).
I have absolutely no idea yet what I’m doing. Please forgive me when I commit a Twitter faux pas. If I get so frustrated with the learning curve, my Twitter account might suffer the same fate as my failed attempt to do a Color Run.
And if the world adds even one more damn social media platform, I AM DONE!
Enjoying yours blogs, Lisa – I’m Aunt Carole’s sister, Jean Ellen. I feel inspired now to try to Tweet just because I don’t want to be an old fogey who isn’t aware of all these things! So, I shall give it a try, too.
Thanks for reading, Jean Ellen. Glad you enjoy my Tweenior Moments blog. As for trying Twitter, all I can say is, “Good luck!” It definitely takes some getting used to trying to figure it out.
I understand completely, but don’t we get some kind of praise for at least trying to do it? I think so, I think it will keep us young, not to mention, connected!! I am following both of your Twitter accounts…so thank you.
I like your take on it, Donna. Maybe it will keep our brain young, kind of like doing Sudoku puzzles. And I do love the connectedness of it all. Following you back on Twitter (I think…I might not be doing it right!).
Ha ha! I totally hear you. Social media is exhausting! I’m now following both of your Twitter handles so we can Tweet to each other!
Thanks, Lois! I definitely feel like a Twidiot with my lack of understanding.
Fun post. I’ve been on Twitter almost from the beginning and I find it easy. I learned how to use hash tags over time and I also have some LISTS that I refer to now and again. But it’s quick and I like making friends on Twitter. As for following, that works out after a while. I don’t follow everyone who follows me. I don’t worry about numbers. It grows slowly, but it grows. Some great folks on Twitter. Now FB, there I get confused! But I’m forcing myself to learn. We should combine our weaknesses!!
I see the similarities between Facebook and Twitter, but they both definitely have a very different vibe. I practically bristle with discomfort as I compose a Tweet.
Lisa, I decided that FB would be my last effort in technology! Since FB I’ve just let the world of tech pass me right on by, lol! Now you have me interested in Twitter….and I might type titter too, ha! Like you, I dictate and punctuate even when I’m leaving a voicemail……..and even when I do that I’m never sure if any of it is right. I couldn’t be a writer because it would probably take me a week just to make sure one sentence was correct!!!!! I know nothing about how to find anyone using the “pound sign”. So, what is @lisabeachwrites……..and @tweeniormoments on Twitter??????? Where does the hashtag come in???? When you get it figured out, let me know……..HA. In the meantime keep on writing and I don’t want to miss anything so I guess I will be forced to get a Twitter account.
Funny that you are asking ME questions about Twitter. I know next to nothing about it. It’s just one more way to connect, share & publicize what I’ve written elsewhere. You won’t miss anything since you’re already subscribed to my Tweenior Moments blog. Thank you for your continued support!
It took me a long time to get on Twitter too! Abbreviations, hashtags, grammar, limited words and chat rooms have ALL been a learning curve for me. I’m right along with you and hopefully we can #figureitouttogether
I am SO uncomfortable using Twitter, especially knowing that any mistakes I make are so very public. It feels like I’m the new student being introduced to a 4th grade class by the teacher halfway through the school year and everyone’s just staring at me thinking, “Who’s the new girl?”